This morning as I was getting my daughter ready for school, she said, "I can do that by myself, Mamma."
I watched as she changed by herself ,so confident and unhurried. I felt proud to have taught her well. As I knelt down to do up her shoes, she said," No Mamma,I'll do it."
Again, I took a step back and watched as she worked on her shoe laces.Her little forehead crinkled in concentration, she managed to do it just fine. The clock ,at that moment chimed the half past eight gong and we rushed out to school.
Something was bothering me, but at that moment I didn't it give it a thought.
On the way back from school, that upsetting thought came back.
Am I becoming redundant? Does my daughter not need me anymore? She is ready to do things by herself. And more importantly , she wants to. A state of panic hit me, for a moment.
I am not sure, who depends on whom. Do I depend on her more than she on me? Is that a possibility? Truth can come home in many ways. As she is growing , I am teaching her to be confident and to learn to do things by herself, as any mother would. Isn't that what I want? But in that process, I am slowly making myself redundant.
This process will continue until she is an adult and can finally spread her wings and soar high up in the sky. Yes! That is what I want. I am sure of it!!
In the meantime, I am going to look at other avenues to full fill myself as an individual. I know, my daughter has a lot left to learn. But how time flies! I don't want to be one of those clingy kind of mothers who molly coddle their children and don't want to let go. I will continue to let her be independent and grow into an individual.
Eventually, I will be a proud parent of a well adjusted child. And as a mother , I will always be by her side. HEY! THAT'S JUST WHAT MY MOTHER DID!!